A gentleman walked into the Campus for Creative Aging last week, just to see what was going on here. For those of you not yet familiar, the Campus for Creative Aging, part of the Area Agency on Aging, is a new learning community where older adults come together to share, expand, and unlock their capacity for creative expression, lifelong learning, personal growth, and living with purpose.
This 95-year-old man, who I’ll call Mick, said he had driven by a couple of times, and thought about checking it out. His 102-year-old aunt had once told him that the key to happiness and longevity was to have friends younger than yourself.
So, when Mick saw, “Meet New Friends” on the electronic sign outside, he decided to take a chance. We sat and talked for a while. I learned a bit about his life, his military and work background, his family, and some of the hardships and joys he’s experienced. After talking about the Campus, who we are and who we hope to be, we settled on computer classes as a starting point for Mick.
It can be difficult to make new friends. For many people, venturing out to a new place can be intimidating, if not overwhelming.
A couple of weeks ago my car wouldn’t start, and I had to wait until someone could pick me up for work. It was an hour or so past my usual leaving time. It was a beautiful morning, so I sat outside on my front step and enjoyed the fresh air. While out, I saw many of my neighbors who I had not seen in quite a while. One was walking her dog; one coming home from the grocery store, one washing his truck, and a young mom attempting a walk with her toddler.
We all exchanged a sort of greeting, even if only a wave. I kept smiling at the idea that this probably happens every day all around the neighborhood; I’m just not there to see it.
So, when I think about making new friends, I had an “aha!” moment. If I always do the things I’ve always done, I’ll continue to see the same people I always see! Now, I like my life, my circle of friends, and I am a creature of habit when it comes to the places I usually go. That includes the same grocery store, same coffee stop, same gas station, same restaurants, same route to work, etc.
You see where I’m going with this, right? Baby steps outside of our comfort zone could certainly lead us to new adventures, and possibly to new and meaningful friendships.
Go out a different night. Take a different route on your walk. Grab your morning coffee at a new place; maybe even sit down for a few minutes and say hi to a stranger.
There’s a place my husband and I enjoy going to in the summer where we can sit outside to eat. Sometimes we have to share a picnic table with people we don’t know. We have had more fun those evenings than we could have imagined.
If you have a dog, take it to a dog park. It’s almost impossible not to chat with others who have brought their furry friend to the same place. You already have something in common.
I so enjoyed my time with Mick. And I bet it took a little courage for him to walk in the door of a strange place. Just from our brief conversation, I’m guessing he will make a new friend or two through taking a computer class. He is someone I want to know better, and if he had not taken a chance I may have missed that opportunity. Kudos, Mick!